I would have done

I would have done was written by esbeani (Olivia Chrestomanci) and posted on her LJ on 26 November, 2008. It is written from Sam's POV and deals with the four months of Dean's death and subsequent time spent in Hell between the end of season 3 and the beginning of season 4.

You can listen to and download the song at Reverbnation.

I would have done I heard your voice in every sound Had to learn to hold my body still Cause the body’s blind though the mind is sure I knew you were gone but my body’d turn To look for you I looked for you on the open road I drove your car through yellow fields I dreamed each night that you called my name Had to let you go when morning came When the sun rose had to let you go again. Oh I dreamed you spoke my name in tears You were four months gone it was forty years I took my comfort where I could I bit her skin and thought of you The whiskey was strong and it dulled my mind But the bottles glowed like heated eyes Like you saw me. Now no one knows me as I am And no one knew me as I was D’you remember the way that we were raised On the taste of salt and the scent of flame? Now I talk to myself as I fall asleep gotta talk my way through memories hold you the only way I can. Oh I dreamed you spoke my name in tears You were four months gone it was forty years. I dreamed you spoke my name in tears You were four months gone you were four months gone. – Olivia Chrestomanci, esbeani@lj