15.14 Last Holiday (transcript)
Written by: Jeremy Adams
Directed by: Eduardo Sanchez
Air Date: October 8, 2020TEASER
>Opening Montage:
Cuthbert Sinclair is responsible for bunker’s warding
THEN:
Abaddon kills off Men of Letters
Billie (Death) says God is killing off universes
Billie explains Jack’s quest
NOW:
Act 1
Men of Letters Bunker, time of day unknown.
Scene opens on Sam doing research in the library when odd clanking noises are heard from the bunker. Dean enter from the kitchen via the map room wearing white chef’s apron.
DEAN: Did you hear that?
SAM: What’s with the apron?
DEAN: Burgers! But the pilot light keeps going out. It’s like the third time this week. Between that and the hot water, I thought this place was supposed to be stat-of-the-art.
SAM: It was, in the 50’s
DEAN: Hhm. Ah, Jack come out of his room yet?
SAM: No. I mean, can you blame him? His soul is back. Everything is hitting him. Everything he’s done. Everything he has to do. Amara.
DEAN: Yeah. Well, I mean Billie said it, to kill Chuck, you gotta kill Amara, too.
SAM: Yeah. Cas is still looking but you know what? Say – Say one of his angel contacts does find her. What then?
DEAN: Then we do what we gotta do.
We hear odd clanking noises from the bunker again and the fan stops.
DEAN: Oh, come on. Now the air?
SAM: [Sighs]
DEAN: [Sighs} Alright. Well, let’s go.
SAM: Go where?
DEAN: [taking off apron] To— Dude, we fought the Devil, okay? I killed Hitler. I think we can handle a few old pipes.
Sean and Sam descend a curved metal staircase into the basement of the bunker. The room has large pipes, a workbench, and a control panel.
SAM: [carrying schematics for the bunker] The gas and water converge down here. Maybe. It’s too bad we can’t just call a plumber.
DEAN: Oh, yeah – “Uh, hey Mario Brothers? Yeah, could you come to the most secretive, secure, supernatural hideout in the world? Great. Thanks. Go, Luigi!” [walking up to control panel] What is this?
SAM: This is the bunker… grid control – center thing – I – thingy.
DEAN: Yeah, of course. “Reset.” “Standby.”
SAM: What?
DEAN: Why? What do I do when, uh, you know my computer has too many pop-ups? Turn it off, turn it back on again. Hmm?
SAM: No, I don’t think that’s –
Dean hits the reset button. We hear clanking and the bunker powers down.
SAM: [Sighs] I was gonna say I don’t think that’s a –
DEAN: Shh, shh, shh.
SAM: – a good idea.
The bunker powers back up and the lights come back on.
DEAN: Ha-ha! Victory! [Dean ascends the staircase] Now… burger time. Meat man! Comin’ to town!
Interior of Dean’s room. Dean enters whistling, looking at his phone, and carrying a large hamburger and a beer. He puts the plate and beer down and turns to see an older woman in his room.
MRS. BUTTERS: [folding Dean’s Scooby Doo boxers] Oh. Hello dear. [continues humming and folding Dean’s underwear]
DEAN: Sam!
TITLE SEQUENCE SEASON 15
MRS. BUTTERS: [Running fingers along shelf] ohh! How you’ve lived in this filth is beyond me.
DEAN: Beyo – Lady, who the hell are you?!
MRS. BUTTERS: [Gasps] Language!
DEAN: That’s it. I’m getting my gun. [turning to leave] Sammy!
SAM: Yeah, hey. I was, uh… Uh...hi? Dean, What’s going on?
DEAN: Well, I was walking into my room, about to, uh, dive into my Dean Deluxe. I look up, and there she is, folding my, uh, underthings.
SAM: Your underthings?
Dean: My –
MRS. BUTTERS: Well, if you’d folded them properly to begin with.
Dean throws up his hands in disbelief
SAM: I’m sorry. Who are you?
MRS. BUTTERS: My true name is – Oh, it’s hardly decipherable in your tongue. Mr. Ganem called me Mrs. Butters. [Giggles}
DEAN: Oh, Mrs. Butters.
SAM: Wait, our tongue? So, w-what? You’re not human?
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, no. No, no. [in a serious tone] I’m a wood nymph.
DEAN: Okay, well, shouldn’t you be in the woods somewhere, nymphing?
MRS. BUTTERS: [Sighs] Well, alas… that is a young one’s game. But no, no, I have much more important things to do. And besides, I live here.
SAM: Okay, So – So you’re a Man of – Uh, you’re a Lady of Letters?
MRS. BUTTERS: [Chuckling] Oh, God, no. I was never a member, no. No, no. No, I was more of a helper. I, uh, took care of the cleaning and laundry and the cooking. The Men of Letters, though highly intelligent, were oblivious to the necessities of life. But they were my boys. My family.
DEAN: Well, that’s very progressive. Uh, well, we don’t want any trouble, so you can just leave.
MRS. BUTTERS: Leave? But – this is – this is my home. Well, I have worked for the Men of Letters since before the war.
SAM: The war? What year do you think it is?
MRS. BUTTERS: 1958.
DEAN: Oh.
SAM: Oh.
DEAN: Well, afraid to tell you, but it’s. uh – it’s 2020.
MRS. BUTTERS: It – Well – then – Well, where is Mr. Markham? Mr. Ackers? Where – Where are the rest of the Men of Letters?
DEAN: You’re looking at ‘em. The rest of them are, um – they’re dead.
MRS. BUTTERS: How?
DEAN: A demon named Abaddon killed them, all of them.
MRS. BUTTERS: [tearfully] Oh. [Turns to see old picture of the Men of Letters on the wall] Oh. That’s why they didn’t come back.
We see a feather duster whoosh over picture and the tone of the picture and room changes. Mrs. Butters is dusting the library.
MRS. BUTTERS: [voice over] When the lads left for the ceremony, I was told to stay behind and guard the bunker. But they never returned. So to keep the bunker safe, I placed it and myself in standby mode.
Mrs. Butters is standing in front of the bunker’s control panel. She pushes the “standby” button. We hear clanking from the bunker and then a whooshing as Mrs. Butters turns to green smoke and enters three warding symbols which then glow red. The symbols return to normal color and we are sent back to the picture of the Men of Letters.
MRS. BUTTERS: I never dreamed it would take this long to be reactivated.
SAM: Yeah, we really don’t totally know everything about this place yet.
DEAN: It’s been one apocalypse after the other.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, no. It’s fine. I know how busy your work can be. If you’re anything like the others, then it has been an age since you’ve had a home-cooked meal or celebrated the holidays or – oh – ahem – washed your clothes.
SAM: Yeah, we’re not really holiday people.
MRS. BUTTERS: It’s worse than I thought.
DEAN: You said, uh, that – that we were on standby mode. So this entire time, we’ve been operating on, uh, like, half power?
MRS. BUTTERS: The Men of Letters used my magic to give the bunker an extra oomph. [snaps fingers]
We hear the bunker power up some more.
DEAN: Whoa.
Light by telescope changes to green. Electricity crackles and device somewhere beeps.
DEAN: Hmm?
SAM: What’s that?
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh. The radar of course.
DEAN: [Looking at target light on map table] We have a monster radar?
MRS. BUTTERS: the chime indicates something relatively nearby. And by the color, it looks to be a nest of vampires. [touching target] 50 miles away. 725 Black Drive.
DEAN: We have a monster radar.
MRS. BUTTERS: Yeah. Well, if you boys hurry, I imagine you can clean out that nest and make it back here in time for supper.
DEAN: Oh, hell yeah!
MRS. BUTTERS: Ohh – ooh.
DEAN: Heck – Heck yeah.
MRS. BUTTERS: Alright. [exits map room]
SAM: Dean, hold up. How do we know we can trust her?
DEAN: Look at her. It isn’t that big of a stretch to think that the Men of Letters wouldn’t have found somebody to help out. I mean, they were basically a bunch of uppity, preppy bachelors, you know? Having a – whatever she is – it’s almost required.
SAM: Yeah, but –
DEAN: Look, why don’t – why don’t we go check it out, alright? If the nest is real, then she’s telling the truth, and we know we just caught a serious break, and we have not been catching those lately.
SAM: And if it isn’t?
DEAN: Then we deal with it.
SAM: What about Jack?
We see Jack sitting on his bed. Dean knocks.
DEAN: Hey, Jack? [no reply] Okay. Uh, listen, me and Sam we gotta head out. Um, but, uh, we have a guest that’s staying here, kind of. She’s, uh – She’s probably harmless, but just in case, watch yourself, alright? And if anything happens, obviously, give us a call. And she’s, uh – She’s making cookies. Snickerdoodle. So if you want some – Okay.
We see Baby roaring down a dark road.
SAM: Even if she is what she says she is, some kind of –
DEAN: Magic Roomba?
SAM: Whatever. Do you think it’s a good idea having her around?
DEAN: [Scoffjs] Well, we do have the son of Satan living down the hall.
SAM: I’m serious. I mean, Chuck is deleting worlds. Amara is… somewhere. And Jack, he’s –
DEAN: A mess.
SAM: Yeah.
DEAN: He’ll be fine. I mean, I’ve been through worse. Look at me, I’m the picture of health.
SAM: Ignoring your trauma doesn’t make you healthy.
DEAN: Sure it does.
SAM: Right. I don’t know. Feels like Jack is hiding something.
DEAN: He just needs some time, you know, some space. It’s the only thing that works.
SAM: I hope you’re right.
We see Jack laying on his bed. Mrs. Butters is holding a plate with a sandwich and knocks on the door.
MRS. BUTTERS: Hello, Jack? [no reply] Jack, Sam and Dean told me you were going through a hard time. And I thought I’d make you a sandwich in case you were hungry. [no reply] Well, I’ll just – I’ll leave it outside the door in case you change your mind.
Interior vampire nest. Two vampires are watching TV.
TV: Mr. Barnabas. Where are you going Ben?
VAMPIRE 1: Hey, how come vampires like that live in mansions and we live here?
TV: In my new life I have been discovering that I have strange and remarkable powers. What kind of powers?
Vampire 1 empties blood bag into large fountain cup with curly straw.
TV: You will find out soon enough. Where have you been? Digging a grave? Whose grave?
VAMPIRE 1: [finishing slurping blood] Ahh!
Loud thud as door blows open Dean and Sam enter
DEAN: Any bloodsuckers in here?
Sam and Dean swiftly decapitate the vampires.
DEAN: Whoo! Well that’s gotta be a record. I mean no investigation, no dead ends. Just ding! Bloodsuckers. That monster radar rules.
SAM: Yeah.
Sam and Dean return to the bunker and find jazzy Christmas music playing, lights strung, and a large Christmas tree with a toy train on top of the map table.
MRS. BUTTERS: [Running in with plate of decorated cookies] Merry Christmas! Ha-ha ha! [Giggles and twirls]
DEAN: Oh. We are so keeping her.
Mrs. Butters continues to sing and laugh. Dean begins to act like an excited child while Sam looks concerned.
ACT II
Men of Letters bunker kitchen.
The next morning
Mrs. Butters has made waffles and puts a big plate of them in front of Sam.
MRS. BUTTERS: Well, you boys have spent so much time killing monsters, it seems like you haven’t had a chance to celebrate much of anything.
SAM: So that’s why we’re doing Christmas?
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, phbbt! Don’t be so dour, Samuel. Take a breath. Smile! Enjoy the world you’re fighting for. Oh, we have so much lost time to make up for! Christmas and Easter and Thanksgiving. I make a mean apple-cranberry sauce.
Jack enters kitchen
SAM: Jack. Hey, uh, this is, uh…
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh. This is Jack.
Jack waves
MRS. BUTTERS: What are you?
DEAN: [wearing purple nightshirt and hat from Scooby Doo] He’s a millennial. Don’t let that throw you. He’s a good kid.
SAM: Are you wearing…
DEAN: Oh. Dude, you gotta see this thing. It’s like I’m wrapped in hugs.
Dean lifts up hem and Sam makes a face like he’s going to be ill.
SAM: Oh! [Gagging]
DEAN: You gotta feel this thing. Look at this. The – oh. Heh-he. [Puts nightshirt hem down] I don’t know where you got this, Mrs. B, but best gift ever.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, you’re welcome, dear. [Turning to Jack] Well, if they vouch for you, then it’s okay by me. Oh, good heavens, you must be starving.
JACK: Umm, I’m not that hungry.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, poppycock. A young boy like you. Here. [Hands Jack large glass of creamy liquid] Try this. You’ll love it.
DEAN: Smoothie! I want one.
MRS. BUTTERS: You…may have tomato juice. I’m worried about your cholesterol. Tsk, tsk, tsk.
Klaxon alarm blaring
DEAN: Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho! We got one!
Sam and Dean run out of kitchen and to their bedrooms. We then see Sam and Dean dressed and pass by the kitchen where Mrs. Butters has sack lunches prepared for each of them.
MRS. BUTTERS: [Handing one to Dean] No crusts.
DEAN: Ohh, Mrs. B, you’re the best.
MRS. BUTTERS: [Handing one to Sam] Samuel, the radar says it’s a lamia. I put blessed knives in the trunk. And tell Dean to take it easy on the car. I just waxed it.
JACK: Should I come or…?
SAM: Wha—No, no, Jack, it’s fine. We got it.
MRS. BUTTERS: Bye-bye! [Turning to Jack] Well, what shall we do with you? Hmm.
Jack is standing there smiling with a big milk-mustache.
Later that day Mrs. Butters and Jack is doing dishes.
MRS. BUTTERS: So.. your father is Lucifer. Hmm! Oh, my. What’s that like?
JACK: Well, I didn’t really know my father very well. The only family I’ve ever really had is Sam, Dean, Cas, and uh…Mary.
MRS. BUTTERS: Mary? Oh. It’s alright. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.
JACK: Mary was Sam and Dean’s mom and my, um… She was a good friend.
MRS. BUTTERS: Well. She sounds lovely.
JACK: She was. But um… I killed her.
MRS. BUTTERS: Ohh.
JACK: I-I didn’t mean to. It – It was an accident.
MRS. BUTTERS: Well. – Yeah. We all do things, things that we are not proud of. But… life gives us second chances. And it is our obligation to hold onto them. Understand? Would you like another smoothie?
Peppy rockabilly music plays as we see the boys run by the kitchen again and Mrs. Butters handing them each a sack lunch. We see Sam and Dean bust down a door. Sam, Dean and Jack are seated at a library table set with linens and candles. Mrs. Butters is carving a turkey. The three are seen passing various dishes to each other.
Sam and Dean run by the kitchen again and are handed a sack lunch by Mrs. Butters. Sam and Dean bust down another door and take aim at something or someone. The three are carving pumpkins in the library. The table is already full of lit Jack-o-lanterns.
Sam and Dean run by the kitchen again and collect the sack lunches from Mrs. Butters. The three and Mrs. Butters are seated at a library table covered in a checked tablecloth celebrating the 4th of July with hamburgers and beer.
Sam and Dean run by and collect sack lunches from Mrs. Butters again. A door explodes and we see Dean enter with his grenade launcher and Sam has Mjölnir, (Thor’s Hammer). They both smile.
Men of Letter bunker map room. Sam is wearing a birthday tiara and a cake with candles is on the table.
ALL: Happy birthday to you! [Sam blows out candles]
MRS. BUTTERS: Ahh!
DEAN: Oh, Mrs. B, when it’s my birthday, can I put in the request to have the, uh, Rice Krispie treats?
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh. Dear, at your age, I wouldn’t think you’d want to celebrate your birthday. [Everyone chuckles] There’s an extra batch just for you next to the fridge.
DEAN: You are the best!
Jack enters the library drinking another smoothie. He sees Mrs. Butters putting something in some wooden file drawers.
JACK: Mrs. Butters.
MRS. BUTTERS: [Startled] Oh! Yes, dear?
JACK: I was just wondering if you could just, um, make me another smoothie.
MRS. BUTTERS: Of course. Anything for my boys.
Jack investigates the file drawers to see what Mrs. Butters was looking at. He finds her file and a reel of film. Jack loads and watches the film.
FILM:
SINCLAIR: Cuthbert Sinclair, Men of Letters, File 5150. As you know, Henshaw was successful in retrieving the wood nymph from the Thule’s laboratories. After encountering a Nazi battalion, Subject B, casually referred to as “Mrs. Butters,” destroyed upwards of 200 men before she was restrained. Wood nymphs, it would seem, though naturally docile, react violently when home or family are threatened. To that end, I have conducted a series of, uh, experiments designed to show the strange and magical being the importance of our mission. And Mrs. Butters has agreed to join the Men of Letters family for service and security. This… is a member of the Thule, [takes hood off prisoner] who, after a very thorough interrogation, is no longer of any use. Mrs. Butters, if you would. [Mrs. Butters rips head off prisoner]
MRS. BUTTERS: Would anyone like tea or cookies?
In real life
JACK: Son of a bitch.
ACT III
Men of Letters map room. Mrs. Butters is dusting.
JACK: Sam?! Sam!
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, slow down, dear. Is everything alright?
JACK: Uh, yeah. I was just looking for Sam.
MRS. BUTTERS: He’ll be here any minute. He’s got a big date.
JACK: Oh, That’s, um, nice.
MRS. BUTTERS: Are you sure you’re alright? Can I get you some soup or something?
SAM: [Wearing sweater, jacket, and tie] I feel silly. Are you sure I don’t look ridiculous? I feel like I look ridiculous.
MRS. BUTTERS: Not at all. You look dashing! Let me see. Yes, yes. Ow are you sure I couldn’t trim just the ends [of his hair]?
SAM: Stop it.
DEAN: Oh, wow. Somebody’s shopping at Abercrombie and Bitch.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh! Language!
DEAN: Well – [Scoffs]
MRS. BUTTERS: Don’t you listen to him. You look very handsome.
SAM: Eileen’s in town. So I thought, after everything that’s happened, you know, we could go out on a date. Dinner and privacy, something.
DEAN: Heavy on the something!
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, Dean! Now here. I want you to take one of the old cars from the garage. They’re all in tip-top condition now. She’ll be very impressed.
SAM: Thanks.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, and Sam, one more thing. [whooshes up bouquet of red roses] Have fun!
DEAN: Go get ‘em, tiger.
MRS. BUTTERS: You should be nicer to your brother.
DEAN: Well, now why would I do that?
MRS. BUTTERS: Boys. [Scoffs] Oh, Dean, I noticed that there was a broken TV in one of the rooms, and I took the liberty of fixing it.
DEAN: The Dean Cave? You fix — Ha! Yes!
Jack follows Mrs. Butters into the dungeon.
JACK: I know what you are.
MRS. BUTTERS: And what is that?
JACK: I saw the film.
MRS. BUTTERS: And how did it make you feel?
JACK: Feel? I-I don’t understand.
MRS. BUTTERS: Ohh, of course you do. You enjoyed seeing that man, well, no, Nazis are hardly men, that dog’s death. You relished his pain, didn’t you, Jack?
JACK: What? No. Wait. You wanted me to find – Is this some kind of test? To-To what? See if I’m blood thirsty? Dangerous?
MRS. BUTTERS: Aren’t you?
JACK: No.
MRS. BUTTERS: Yes. You are. And Sam and Dean –
JACK: No, that’s not – They know –
MRS. BUTTERS: Know what? How powerful you are? How powerful you’ve become? Because I do. They should be scared of you.
JACK: I would never hurt them.
MRS. BUTTERS: You have before. Haven’t you? Have you ever thought that Sam and Dean keep you here, closed in, secure, because they’re scared you’ll do to someone else what you did to their mother? Now that I’m here they will never have to worry about you again.
Mrs. Butters swoops her hand and throws Jack across the room, slamming into a wall.
JACK: What are you doing?
MRS. BUTTERS: What I’ve always done. I’m protecting my family.
JACK: [Eyes flare gold] Don’t [Whooshing as Jacks powers fade out] What – What—What did you do to me?
MRS. BUTTERS: Well, [handcuffing Jack] you didn’t think those smoothies were for your health, did you? I’ve learned a few things while I was dusting around here. A little yarrow root, some ground jawbone for texture, and, voila, you are as weak as a puppy. [Pushes Jack to floor]
JACK: Why?
MRS. BUTTERS: To make the bunker safe again. To get rid of all the monsters!
Men of Letters bunker kitchen
DEAN: Oh, Mrs. B, I’m starving. Do you have any – Oh-ho! [Mrs. Butters hands him a panini] You are a dream!
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, Well. Eat up, dear. You’ll need your strength so we can go kill Jack.
DEAN: Excuse me?
MRS. BUTTERS: I’ve got him downstairs, trapped. [Pulls out archangel blade]
DEAN: Oh.
MRS. BUTTERS: You and Sam don’t need to be afraid anymore. I will not let what happened to the others happen to you.
DEAN: Damn it! [Puts down panini and takes archangel blade] Yeah, we had a good thing going, and, of course, of course, you had to go full Nurse Ratchet.
MRS. BUTTERS: Well, I don’t know what that means, but Dean, he is a monster. He killed your mother, for heaven’s sake!
DEAN: Yeah. That’s, uh… [looks longingly at panini] Tell you what we’re gonna do. We’ll go downstairs.
MRS. BUTTERS: Right.
DEAN: We’ll let Jack go and forget this ever happened.
MRS. BUTTERS: [Throwing Dean into dungeon with Jack] I’d hoped for better from you Dean. Obviously he’s infected you. Just like the serpent in the garden.
DEAN: Hey. Wait. No, no, no, no!
MRS. BUTTERS: Just like his father!
DEAN: Don’t!
Men of Letters bunker map room. Mrs. Butters is waiting for Sam as he returns from his date.
MRS. BUTTERS: Bit past your curfew, Samuel.
SAM: Yeah. Right. Where are Jack and Dean?
MRS. BUTTERS: Uh, well… I have some good news and some bad news.
ACT IV
Men of Letter bunker map room.
SAM: So Jack has taken over Dean’s mind.
MRS. BUTTERS: Yes.
SAM: And they’re both downstairs.
MRS. BUTTERS: Mm-hmm.
SAM: Right now? Ready to be killed by us?
MRS. BUTTERS: You were always the smart one. Yes.
SAM: Yeah. Okay, um… I’m really glad you caught them.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, it’s no trouble.
SAM: Ooh! You know, uh, I’m gonna, uh, get my gun in my room, and I will meet you downstairs, and we can… get to the killing.
MRS. BUTTERS: Wonderful!
SAM: Yeah, wonderful.
MRS. BUTTERS: Samuel? How was the date?
Cell phone rings. Dean and Jack are in the dungeon. Dean answers.
SAM: Dean, hey. It’s me. I’m back in the bunker, and you got to listen. Mrs. Butters –
DEAN: Went psycho. We know.
SAM: Why didn’t you call me?
DEAN: Well. I mean, I, you know, figured you were “practicing your sign language.”
SAM: And that’s more important than coming to save you?
DEAN: Hmm..
SAM: Dean?
DEAN: It’s been a while for you, man, you know?
SAM: Hey, come on. Alright, alright. Whatever. Just- How do we stop her?
DEAN: I don’t know. Try shooting her.
SAM: Right. Of course. [picking up gun off bed] Alright, Got it. Wait. Will that even work?
DEAN: Wha—How do I know? You were the one that was gonna look into this.
SAM: W-What? No, Dean...Dean. “We” were gonna look into that, and then, you know, we had Christmas, and Thanksgiving and that breakfast for Boxing Day.
DEAN: Oh, that was the best omelet I’ve ever had in my life.
SAM: Yeah.
DEAN: Okay, okay. Go down to the boiler room, right? “cause if hitting “standby’ pulled her into some sort of suspended animation, then…
SAM: Right, of course. Alright. I’ll call you back.
JACK: What now?
DEAN: Well, now we got to figure out a way out of this room.
JACK: I could use my power.
DEAN: No. The amount of power it’d take to get out of those cuffs, that’d be like sending up a flare for Chuck so don’t – don’t do that.
JACK: I have a job, a mission!
DEAN: Jack, stop.
JACK: Do you still think I’m a monster?
DEAN: Okay, I’m just going to say this, okay? Just get it out there. Jack. I’m trying, okay? I really am. But what you did, that’s not easy to forget. Now I was angry with you, for a while. And maybe I still am a little bit, okay? But I’m not gonna let some evil Mary Poppins take you out. Do you understand?
Jack nods.
Men of Letters bunker map room.
SAM: Mrs. Butters?
MRS. BUTTERS: Samuel? What are you doing?
SAM: Mrs. Butters.
MRS. BUTTERS: What is taking so long?
SAM: Oh, I-I just, um…
MRS. BUTTERS: [flicks hand forcing Sam to reveal the gun in his hand] Oh, Samuel. I’m not mad. I’m disappointed. [Turns chair behind Sam, forces him to sit] Well. You know, when they first found me, I didn’t really understand the importance of this place either or of your jobs. But, after Mr. Cuthbert explained it to me, I realized that keeping you boys safe was the most worthwhile occupation in the entire world.
SAM: okay, this isn’t how…
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh! Mm-hmm, it is. Yes. But because you are my favorite, I won’t give up on you. Not yet. That is why I am going to help you understand just the way Mr. Cuthbert helped me.
Jack and Dean in Men of Letters dungeon. Dean is sighting in the archangel blade to hit Jack’s handcuffs.
JACK: Okay, wait. You’re sure this is gonna work?
DEAN: Let’s say yes. Hmm? Okay.
Dean strikes handcuffs with the blade and sends Jack flying across the room, crashing into a cabinet.
DEAN: Ohh! Dang it!
JACK: [Grunting in pain] Ugh!
DEAN: Dang – Damn it. Damn it! “Language’ my ass. Come on, pal. You – You—Oh. [Helping Jack up] Okay, look, there’s no way those things are coming off without the key.
JACK: Should we wait for Sam?
DEAN: Yeah, Sam should have been here by now. You – I have another idea.
JACK: Yeah?
DEAN: [Chuckles]
Men of Letters bunker library
MRS. BUTTERS: Now, lesson one. Jack is Lucifer’s son. Therefore Jack is a monster! I’ve already had one monster take my family from me. I won’t have it happen again.
SAM: Jack’s not a monster. Jack is a kid. A-A kid who – who’s gone from one tragedy in his life to another!
MRS. BUTTERS: No! He is not a “kid”! He has blood on his hands. I can smell it. Now, Mr. Cuthbert taught me that pain [whooshes Sam’s fingers out straight] can be a wonderful teacher. Let’s see if it can’t correct your ways. Ohh. This is going to hurt me a lot more than it is going to hurt you.
Sam gasps and groans and then screams as Mrs. Butters pulls off the fingernail of his index finger. Sam continues to groan in pain as he looks at his finger.
Men of Letters dungeon
DEAN: Alright, now remember, pain is just weakness leaving the body, hmm? On three. Here we go. One. Two…
Loud clanging noise and Jack bursts through the door of the dungeon.
JACK: Uhh! [Groaning]
DEAN: Hey. Hey. Yeah, see? Not so bad, right? Huh? Come on. Let’s go.
Men of Letters bunker library
MRS. BUTTERS: Jack may not want to kill you now, but he will. It’s in his nature! The sooner you accept this, the sooner we can be done!
Dean and Jack descend the stairs into the basement of the bunker. Dean grabs a hammer from the workbench and smashes the reset button. The electricity powers down and an alarm blares, emergency lights are on.
Men of Letter bunker library
Dean enters with his gun drawn. Sam is still sitting in the chair.
SAM: Dean.
DEAN: She gone?
SAM: uh, yeah.
DEAN: It worked!
SAM: Yeah, it worked.
DEAN: Ah-ha-ha! Problem solved.
In the basement we see the symbols on the walls start to glow red and then the plumbing and the control panel start to shake violently. Steam hisses from a broken pipe then it bursts into a cloud of steam. Mrs. Butters appears with green glowing eyes from within the steam cloud and marches quickly up the stairs.
Men of Letters bunker library
DEAN: Yeah. Ohh. [Noticing Sam’s lack of fingernails] Ahh. That is…
SAM: Yeah, thanks.
MRS. BUTTERS: You have all been very bad!
Mrs. Butters whooshes her arms, sending all three men across the room.
MRS. BUTTERS: I’m not going to fail. Not again! You thought you could destroy us? Destroy our family?!
JACK: No.
MRS. BUTTERS: I wasn’t there for them before. But now I am going to stop you from hurting them!
SAM: No, no, no, no, no, no. Mrs. Butters, don’t.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, Samuel, you will thank me eventually.
SAM: You hurt him, you hurt us.
MRS. BUTTERS: No, he’s infected you! I have to keep you safe.
SAM: By trying to kill the people we care about?
MRS. BUTTERS: I – He’s – He’s a monster! That’s why Mr. Cuthbert said I couldn’t go back to my forest, because of things like that!
SAM: No. Mr. Cuthbert used you, okay? He lied to you. Mr. Cuthbert tortured you.
DEAN: He could save the world.
MRS. BUTTERS: What?
DEAN: He can save the world.
MRS. BUTTERS: [Disoriented] What?
DEAN: That’s why were here, isn’t it? Us, the Men of Letters. That’s the whole mission, is saving the world. He can do exactly that!
Mrs. Butters begins sobbing. The bunker’s power starts up and the lights are restored.
MRS. BUTTERS: I just… I miss them so much.
ACT V
Men of Letters bunker library, later that evening.
Mrs. Butters waves her hand over Sam’s hand sans fingernails and restores them. Sam groans.
MRS. BUTTERS: There you go sweetie. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry about everything.
JACK: It’s okay. Really.
MRS. BUTTERS: Thank you.
SAM: Mrs. Butters, uh, you said Cuthbert convinced you to come work for them but really, you just wanted to go back home.
MRS. BUTTERS: Oh, yes I did.
DEAN: And now?
MRS. BUTTERS: Ohh. I would love to see the… the woods again. See the sun streaming through the trees. Oh, you boys would love it. Creeks and animals, snow and… Oh, I’m getting carried away.
JACK: Then it’s settled.
Men of Letters bunker map room
Mrs. Butters is seen with her bag and wearing her hat and coat.
MRS. BUTTERS: Sadly, without my magic the bunker will revert to standby mode. So…
DEAN: Ah, well, things were getting too easy anyway, you know? Who needs a monster radar? Or whatever that telescope thing is.
MRS. BUTTERS: It’s an interdimensional geoscope.
SAM: It’s – It’s a… what?
DEAN: I looked in it earlier. I didn’t see anything.
MRS. BUTTERS: Ohh. Oh, that’s not good.
Jack hands Mrs. Butters a framed picture of the Men of Letters
MRS. BUTTERS: Ohh. Oh, look what you’ve done. Oh, I shall treasure it always. [Chuckles] Well, I guess it’s time. It – oh, Dean, eat your vegetables. And Sam… cut your hair. And Jack… go save the world. Well, goodbye, boys.
Mrs. Butters snaps her fingers and disappears. We see the green light around the telescope fade away.
Men of Letters bunker library. Sam and Jack are having a beer.
SAM: Are you, uh… You know if there’s anything you want to talk about…
JACK: I know. It’s just… I’m supposed to kill God and I got… She got me. Because I was stupid and… Sam, do you really think I can do this?
SAM: Jack, you’re the only one who can.
DEAN: Alright, alright! Heh-heh! [Enters wearing a chef’s apron and carrying a covered cake plate]
SAM: He loves that apron.
DEAN: Boom. Now, Mrs. Butters was right, okay? We are busy. Sometimes a little too busy. But right now… Ta-da!
Dean lifts the cover to reveal a lopsided cake with sprinkles mostly on one side reading “HAPPY BIRTHDAY JACK!” Sam and Jack smile at Dean.
DEAN: I made it myself. Obviously. I mean it’s, you know, not like Mrs. Butters makes it, but…
JACK: It’s great.
DEAN: Alright, here we go. [lights a candle and sticks into center of cake] Happy birthday, Jack.
SAM: Alright, make a wish.
We watch as Jack closes his eyes to make his wish and then blows out the candle to blackness.
END CREDITS
DELETED SCENE
SC 36
INT. MEN OF LETTERS BUNKER - HALLWAY - NIGHT
SAM is searching the hallways for MRS. BUTTERS, gun at the ready.
